Candle Lighting
The couple each light a candle to represent their individual lives before marriage. In their equal partnership, they care for one another through all circumstances, sharing both joy and sorrow, while respecting each other's uniqueness, symbolised by the two candles. Together, they then light a third candle, representing their union in marriage. The three candles illustrate both their togetherness and individuality.
Elements Well Wishing
As a unique way to symbolise a union is to celebrate life’s essential elements. A well-wishing is said to all the elements. Earth, Air, Water and Fire. There are many ways of doing this, depending on where the ceremony is taking place.
Sand Ceremony
A marriage is symbolised by the pouring together of two individual containers of sand, representing the Bride and the Groom (or Brides, or Grooms) and all that they were, all that they are, and all that they will ever be. As these two containers of sand are poured into the third container, the grains of sand can never again be separated. If you have children, additional sand can be added, binding you together as a family.
Planting a Tree
The tree symbolises your hopes for the future as well as the beauty and wonder of life. Whether a tree grows depends on the nurture it receives. No tree grows alone. They all need the soil, the sunshine and the rain. So too, a marriage needs to be nourished, and the couple will be there for each other through all the seasons of their life together; to support, love and nurture each other.
Exchange of Flowers
The language of flowers, has its roots throughout history. Using flowers to send a message probably dates to prehistoric times as symbolic use of flowers is mentioned in Egyptian inscriptions, in Chinese writings and in both Greek and Roman mythology. And so, the happy couple exchange white roses, which symbolise purity, charm and innocence.
Gathering of Flowers
As your guests arrive, present them with a flower. Each one of these flowers is different, each one is beautiful, and each one will add its own unique qualities to the bouquet that will made when they are gathered together. All your guests have each brought their own qualities to their relationships with you, their own beauty, their own colour and their own influence… And now as they gather together for this most special of occasions, a nominated person will gather these flowers together, each flower representing their place in the Couple’s lives. The beautiful bundle of flowers represents the colour and the beauty that each person brings into your lives, and with the placing of each flower, the bouquet changes, each flower playing its own part in influencing how the final bouquet will look and feel. This bouquet will now be the centre-piece of this ceremony, and the reception to follow.
Mexican Hug
You’ll be aware of the tradition in some churches of shaking hands with the people around you during a service. Well, this is more of modern twist on that. Now you all know what a Mexican wave is don’t you? A Mexican Hug starts with the newlyweds giving each other a hug, they will then hug someone else, who’ll hug the person next to them and so on, until every single person in the room has been well and truly hugged! You never know - you might have started something - maybe another couple will meet and fall in love at the wedding!
Release of Doves
For thousands of years, white doves have been a traditional symbol in wedding ceremonies. To the ancient Egyptians, the dove represented quiet innocence. The Chinese saw it as a symbol of peace and long life. To early Greeks and Romans, doves symbolised love, devotion, and caring. It was also the sacred animal of Aphrodite and Venus, the goddesses of love. White doves at a wedding therefore symbolise love, peace, and good luck. As you may know, doves usually pair up for life, so they are a beautiful representation of the lasting commitment that the happy couple have made. It is said that if doves are seen on your wedding day, a happy home is assured.
Release of Butterflies
The butterfly is one of nature’s most symbolic and beautiful creations and is a lovely symbol of new beginnings and rebirths. What better way to celebrate the beginning of a new life together than with the releasing of butterflies on your wedding day? There is an old Indian legend about making a wish as you release the butterflies, so as they are released everyone makes a wish for the couple and wish them much happiness as they take this first step in their married lives together.
RELEASE OF BALLOONS
The balloons represent a wish from each of your guests as you go forward to start your new life as a married couple. As you start your journey, so too do the balloons as they make their journey through the sky. A word of caution - If there are going to be many balloons released, be aware that you may need permission from the local/nearest airport as they are considered a hazard to aircraft. The requirement to inform the Civil Aviation Authority is only where a very large number of balloons (5000+) to be released, but if in doubt, check first. The Balloon Association website is a useful source of information (www.nabas.co.uk) Also be mindful of the ecological implications of releasing balloons! It is possible to get biodegradable balloons made from natural latex, the sap of rubber trees, and the manufacturers claim that these have the same decomposition rate as an oak leaf (about 6 months)
JUMPING THE BROOM
In past times setting up home and getting officially married often took place months apart. This could be due to not having a resident notary to perform the ceremony or to have a trial period before committing to the legal marriage. To give the union a standing in the community the couples would declare their intention to “Live over the Brush” and would in front of family, friends and neighbours, literally, jump over a broom. The broom was then kept in the shared home as a symbol of the union and to encourage good luck. The broom also symbolises the sweeping away of the past and the fact that the happy couple are now starting a new life together. I must admit, this is not my favourite! It is a Health & Safety nightmare, for anyone wearing high heels and a long dress, with the potential to end in disaster (although it might be funny on the video!)
HANDFASTING
Hand-fasting is an ancient Celtic marriage ritual and it involves tying a piece of tartan (or cord or ribbon, if you prefer) around your joined hands, as a symbolic way of representing your union as a married couple. It may well be where the expression “tying the knot” came from. If you’ve seen the 1995 film, 'Braveheart', it shows William Wallace and the love of his life, Murron, having a hand-fasting ceremony. The original idea was that it was a kind of engagement - the couple would be betrothed for a year and a day before they then married. There are a few different ways for a hand-fasting to be done.
WEDDING BAND WARMING
This is a really lovely gesture that includes your friends in family during the ceremony itself. It allows the couple to acknowledge that they know too that it is often with the help and support of those around them, as well as from each other, that will get them through the harder times that they may face in the future. Before making your promise to each other, I would ask the Best Man / Ringbearer to pass the rings (tied together with a ribbon) to the front row from where it is passed around all of the guests to hold and to add their own thoughts, wishes and hopes for their marriage.
HEART ENTWINING
This is when the couple symbolically tie their hearts together. Taking two wicker hearts, each partner ties them together with woven ribbon so that they are joined together. This represents that as the happy couple join their lives today without hesitation and with open and trusting hearts, whatever they encounter, they will encounter it together, so they take each other’s hearts and with it their commitment to love, care and cherish for each other. The hearts now tied together to represent their marriage.
THE QUAICH
An ancient, romantic gesture; that is exceptionally Scottish. It takes place after the declarations have been made, and just after the signing of the marriage schedule. A Quaich is a special kind of two-handled drinking cup that, centuries ago, originated in the Scottish Highlands and is sometimes called the ‘Scottish Loving Cup’, or ‘The Cup of Friendship’. Indeed, in 1589, King James the 6th of Scotland gave Anne of Denmark a Quaich as a gift to celebrate their wedding. Since then, after filling the Quaich with their choice of ‘liquid refreshment’ (perhaps Scotland’s ‘national drink’ - whisky, or, Irn Bru), drinking from the Quaich is seen as a symbol of the shared love that the couple have for one another and after enjoying their first taste of married life together, the happy couple then extend their love and friendship for their witnesses, families and friends by having the Quaich passed around for everyone to have a sip from it. (if your want to!)
OATHING STONE
The Oathing Stone is an old Scottish tradition where the couple place their hands upon a stone while saying their wedding vows. This is taken from the ancient Celtic custom of "setting an oath in stone", inclusion of the oathing stone ceremony in the vows can be deeply moving. Any stone can be used for this purpose. One collected from a favourite place i.e. beach, local beauty spot etc would be appropriate. The stone should then be washed and can also be engraved with a Celtic knot etching, the date of the ceremony and your initials if you wish, although it isn't necessary. You can also hand out stones to your guests, who make a wish for you, then return the stones to you at the end of the ceremony.